Nothing like needing to empty the fridge before a trip to motivate my inner Grannie. I’m currently making both yogurt (WHY did I buy a gallon of milk the week before a trip, what is wrong with me) and plum jam (WHY did I buy a pound of plums, etc). I also blanched and froze green beans (WHY, etc).
I made the mistake of asking Girlchild what fun (not) messaging she’s getting from my family (mom) during her visit that I will need to undo, and apparently I’m an unhappy, unmarried, nondating, artist who won’t be able to get a real job now because I have a tattoo, and I should just get back with my ex.
I’m. Wow. For context: I’M IN MY 50s. 😂🤣😂🤣 omg you guys, I got my (back! It’s on my back!) tattoo for my 50th birthday fkhghflkkl my mom thinks I need a boyfriend I can’t … I’m crying … also my ex and I broke up fourteen years ago.
Oh man. Good stuff. Don’t pile on mom though, she’s a good mom, but she tends to create narratives to worry about and never, ever lets them go, thus me being, apparently, a feckless bohemian who won’t settle down and this is kind of amazing. I assure you I 100% look like your bog standard middle aged mom so this is tickling me when it isn’t annoying me to death.
It’s never too late to scandalize your mother kids.
If you could instantly be granted fluency in 5 languages—not taking away your existing language proficiency in any way, solely a gain—what 5 would you choose?
(via impossibletruths)
I’ve never gotten so many compliments on a blouse, which I literally bought off a $1 rack outside a charity shop next to the post office 😂
you’re going to love again, find a job again, create art again, do what you love again, feel powerful again. you’re going to be back on track. i don’t know when, but you are going to feel like yourself again, eventually. this isn’t the end. hang in there.
(via laughingmistress)
I. Hate. The airport.
Got home after 1 am after putting Girlchild on her flight and of course slept poorly so now I’m brain dead at work. Where I stand all day. Today will be 600 years long and I want to cry.
